Getting to 30 Days

Getting to 30 days sober has been a trip bar none. I can't tell you how many times (ok well I would be embarrassed to tell you) I found my self looking to open a bottle of wine without even reasoning with myself about it. It's like my subconscious took over and I found myself grabbing the bottle and the corkscrew without even thinking about the fact that I had just made a commitment to stop. It was so very difficult to tell myself NO! It's like wrestling with someone else that lives inside me that just does not care what alcohol is doing to me on the inside, not to mention the outside over time. I literally had to get angry with myself and empty the bottle down the sink, all the time thinking what a waste..... Well I decided at that point that I needed help. AA meetings were just not my thing, and neither were all the other organizations that you can join and go to meetings. I needed something that I could access all the time, anytime I needed it! I found it and it worked. Not saying that it will work for everyone but it worked for me. I will write about that plan in my next post. I would love to hear what worked for you!